anatomyofstyle.com: Fit Matters

anatomyofstyle.com: Fit Matters

Fit Matters

I had a fabulous conversation this morning with Cricket Lee. She is a pioneer in the field of sizing. If you are scratching your head and asking what the field of sizing is don't think you've missed something. When I say pioneer....I mean pioneer. The likes of The Wall Street Journal (click the link to see a short video featuring Cricket...be patient, it takes a minute to load), the Today Show (Cricket will be a guest again next week) and countless others have had her talk about her revolutionary sizing system.

So here is the deal about sizing. Can you say that you are always a specific size? Or, can you wear everything from a small to a large depending on the cut? The answer is typically that you can wear a range of sizes depending on the designer, cut or type of fabric. But, what if you could buy clothing based on a uniform sizing system that wasn't just about the size, but it was also by the fit. Like, are you a triangle, hourglass or oval. You would never have to try clothing on again because you would know what size you really were.

Well, Cricket is the woman who has taken this on as her mission. She has a system that doesn't just standardize the way that clothing is sized, but actually starts at the manufacturer. The designer and manufacturer make their designs and patterns to incorporate the various shapes of women. As consumers we will look for clothing that has the Fitlogic symbol attached. We will buy the exact same size every time. I don't know anyone who doesn't think that it would be nice to buy pants that fit in the waist and the hips! Today pants...tomorrow jackets.

It is up to us, the real women, to support the people who have gone to battle in the world of fashion for us. We deserve to be able to buy clothes that are fabulous, affordable and fit well. It is time for us to stand up and say that we believe we are worthy of beautiful clothes made for the real woman's body. Thank you, Cricket, for being our champion!

Please comment to this blog if you believe we are moving in the right direction. And, if you want a great fitting pant visit the Fitlogic website to see where to buy them.

Mommy Jeans

This is a departure from what I normally write, but I would like to discuss "mommy jeans." I've seen a lot of them around lately and am wondering what's going on with these jeans. Just so we are clear, let me define "mommy jeans." These jeans are higher waisted (not a bad thing) and have a tapered leg (not usually a good thing). The combination of the high waist and tapered leg is what makes them "mommy jeans."

The combination is also what makes women look an awful lot like an ice cream cone. Even very thin women have trouble pulling off this style of jean. It just isn't a flattering shape for any body. But, the good news is that there are alternatives! Good alternatives.

I know that for a lot of years it has been difficult to find a jean that you felt covered your bottom when you had to bend even a fraction of an inch. I think that is a very big reason that women have hung on to their dated "mommy jeans." I can completely sympathize. No one wants to feel that exposed when they are running errands, running after kids or simply getting into their cars. The good news, overall, is that waist lines are going up and they are generally not combined with a tapered leg.

When buying a new jean to update your look...go for a boot cut or even wider if you want a really modern look. It is okay for your jeans to come to your belly button or just slightly below. As a matter of fact, they are fairly easy to find now. Eddie Bauer has a great, casual jean that is perfect for daily wear (and its got some stretch to it). Another option is the Coldwater Creek Natural Waist logo cropped jeans. They offer a nice fit at a reasonable price and a wide range of sizes.

I don't want anyone to feel bad if they are still wearing their "mommy jeans." Our goal is to let you know that there are jeans out there that offer a modest fit and will make you look a whole size smaller. Not only will you appear smaller, but you will also look younger with an updated jean. I don't know many women who aren't interested in looking thinner and younger. Happy shopping, ladies!

A little chamelion

I went to an appointment today with a practitioner I see on a regular basis. When she walked out of her office I didn't recognize her. I think the first thing out of my mouth was, "Oh my God! You are gorgeous!" She had completely changed her hair....that's it.

I oood and awed over her hair and had her turn and touched it. I just loved the way it made her look sassy and sexy. She usually has lovely, curly hair that, those of us with straight hair envy, totally reflects her personality. But, this new hair made a different light shine through. It didn't take too long for her to share the secret.

It was a wig. A really good wig! She had found this store and played with various styles one day. She discovered that she liked the way she could change her persona with something as simple as wearing a wig. I have to say....it was working for her. So, the question is, is wearing a wig changing who you are to the point that you are being deceptive?

I personally think that it is just like clothes. Some days you feel different than others. There are days for power suits and days for jogging suits. Doesn't it really depend on who we are in that moment? Fundamentally, I think we always have the same style. If you are a classic you will still be a classic whether you are wearing your version of sexy or your version of work attire. But a wig helps you to express who you are in that moment. That's how this friend was feeling. She was expressing a more joyous side of who she is.

Think about the possibilities that open up with the wigs that are available today. When I got married I wanted my hair to be in a high up do. Well, I just didn't have enough hair to make that happen. I was going to be in Los Angeles on business and what better place to find hair than the city of angels. I visited His&Her hair on Wilshire Blvd. I think that is when I became a hair junky. But on the day that I got married my hair was piled high on top of my head with flowers braided into it. I felt, appropriately, just like a princess.

Next time you are feeling like you want a little change in your life, don't discount what a change of hair can do for you.

Spring Cleaning Your Closet

The state of my closet is a direct reflection of what is going on in my life. When my closet looks organized and holds just the clothes that I am currently wearing...my life also seems to be organized and sailing along swimmingly. When my closet gets away from me and becomes chaotic I find that things in my life are also uncertain and crazy. I don't know which comes first....the closet or the life, but I do know that they are related!

So, as I look at my closet this weekend (the last official weekend of winter), I got that Spring cleaning bug. All of a sudden I wanted everything out of my closet. I really am a less is more girl and prefer to have 10 fabulous outfits in my closet instead of a bunch of stuff that isn't perfect for me. I dug in and got my closet back in order and it felt so good.

I have been working with women for years regarding their appearance, shopping and the dreaded closet organization. The thing that is hardest for women to do for themselves is get in that closet and get it working for them. I thought I would share with you the steps that I use with clients and for myself.

1. Look at each piece in your closet with brutal honesty and ask yourself if you feel great when you wear that item. Ask yourself if it fits well, if it is in good condition, does the color look good on you and does it reflect your personality. I have a beautiful, turquoise, cashmere sweater that I bought several years ago. It is the perfect color and it was expensive. I finally gave it up and got it out of my closet because it just didn't fit well. You have to be very honest with yourself when you go through this step...even if it means that you are getting rid of the majority of your wardrobe.

   Clothes that do not make you feel great can actually damage your self esteem.

   Take anything out of your closet that needs attention. Whether it is alterations, dry cleaning, repair, ironing or anything else. Put these items in the appropriate stack and make a pledge to yourself to get these taken care of, in a set amount of time, so that you can enjoy wearing them.

   Neglecting clothes that would work for you is like leaving dollar bills just hanging uselessly in your closet.

   Take anything out of your closet that doesn't have something to go with it. I have this rich, caramel colored, silk blouse that has to have something under it because it is so low cut. The color is beautiful on me and I love the top. I have not had anything to wear it with for close to a year. I just haven't made it a priority to get something to go under it. This weekend I took it out of my closet, made a note in my planner to get something to go with it and promised myself that if I haven't gotten something by the end of the month then it really isn't that important and I will give it away.

   Things that hang in your closet without purpose create clutter in your mind.

   Finally, take the clothes that are left and organize them in a format that works for you. I am going to share with you several ways that I organize clients closets. Everyone has a different personality and therefore a different approach to organization.

• Hang your clothes by type: all blouses together, all skirts together, all pants, etc. The person who is traditional and classic prefers to hang her clothes this way and make the most out of her wardrobe overall.
• Hang your clothes by color: put all of your blues, browns, reds, blacks, etc. together in groups. The person who like to hang her clothes this way is creative and likes to pull together outfits by color vs. type.
• Hang your clothes by outfit: put an entire outfit together on the rack including blouse, jacket, pants, scarf, etc. The person who enjoys organizing her wardrobe this way doesn't want to spend any time trying to pull together an outfit. She would rather wear the same combination over and over for the ease of having it together in her closet.

Organizing your closet according to your personality is the way to create a sense of well being whenever you get dressed.

It is important to put ourselves on the list. Many times women put off doing something for themselves because they are so busy taking care of everyone else. I promise that if your closet is not in the order that you would like for it to be and you take the time to do something about that...it will positively impact your life.

Transitional Clothing

The other day was a beautiful, sunny afternoon in the 60's. I put the top down on my car and relished in the warm sunshine. The funny thing is that there was still snow on the ground from the 10 inches we received earlier in the week. Could it be any harder to get dressed during this season? This time of year is always a challenge. And, technically it is still Winter, but our minds and bodies seem to be longing for Spring.

So, we go to get dressed in the morning when there is a little chill in the air and it is hard to figure out what to wear that will be comfortable all day long. Our heavier sweaters and jackets may be just a little too much right now. However, the lighter linen and cotton jackets may feel a little bit too "Springy" since it is still winter. Here are the suggestions that we have to help you make it through this transitional time.

1. Layer, layer, layer. You cannot go wrong if you are wearing things that you can pile on in the morning and take off during the day. Make sure that you are wearing items that you are comfortable with even if you take off a jacket or sweater.


2. Wear lighter colors in heavier fabrics. Go ahead and break out the white, brights and pastels as long as they are in heavier knits, wool or a tweed. The lighter color will make you feel like Spring while the heavier fabric will help you to stay warm.
   
   


3. Wear bright colored leather. You will be warm and chic. The brighter color will help your mood to stay sunny.


4. Finally, wear something patent. Whether it is shoes, a handbag or even a jacket...the shine will create a sense of light and brightness. Patent has a way of lightening even the most wintery of outfits!

The good news is that this weather won't last long and we will be able to pull out our Spring frocks in just a few weeks! Until then stay warm and cool.

Does Size Matter?

I have to start this blog entry with a disclaimer. I absolutely do not believe that size matters when it comes to beauty. I think that if we put parameters around what beauty looks like that we end up with a society that has no flavor or diversity. We end up all looking the same. With that said...I want to talk about size and clothing.

Here goes....I am 4'11" and range from a size 10-14 on any given day. Today, I happen to be around a size 14. A lot of women keep wardrobes in a couple of different sizes. I keep 3 wardrobes in different sizes and can change size 3 times in a month depending on what I am eating and how much exercise I am getting. I don't mind my size. I wear it well and don't spend too much energy on worrying about it unless I am trying to buy clothes.

The only time that clothing fits me well is when I am a size 4 in misses or 6 in petites. Otherwise, most things are too long in the torso (I am short waisted) and long in the rise (still short waisted). I have all the resources in the country available to me and I still struggle to find clothing that fits well. So, what is the solution?

Here is the best way to handle being a size that clothing manufacturers do not address:

1. Less is more! Don't buy something and wear it because it fits okay. Wear things that fit fabulous even if that means you wear them over and over. You will feel better than if you wear something that you fuss with the entire time that you have it on.
2. Avoid shopping sales. Buy what fits you well regardless of the price. If you follow the less is more philosophy you can afford to spend more on clothing that makes you feel good about yourself.
3. Find a seamstress who can alter what you buy. Lengths on sleeves, pants and skirts can easily be changed. Find a seamstress who has the skills to do even more. Mine recently removed the waistband and zipper of a skirt that had a decorative bottom and shortened it from the top.
4. Do not blame your body. The fault does not lie in your size or shape. Designers and manufacturers are not addressing the needs of all women. Bottom line....be kind to yourself. The more you hate your body and the way you look, the more it effects the quality of your life.

There is a change coming in the apparel industry. Finally, the people in the industry are beginning to see the value in addressing different women's shapes and sizes. A couple of examples are Fitlogic Pants that are sold according to waist and hip size and Triofit from Rebecca&Drew Manufacturing that are sold according to bra size, waist and hip measurements (unfortunately, they aren't available in petites). My favorite, not just because she is a friend, but because she has the product that stresses us the most is Lori Coulter TrueMeasure bathing suits. A body scan takes over 140 measurements and translates those into the perfect fitting bathing suit!

The changes will continue to be made as long as women demand it and support the pioneers in this area. Remember, buy less for more and get the most!

Vacation

I apologize to those of you who read this blog regularly. I am in Puerto Rico this week and thought that I could post from here. I have found that I do not have regular service and will not be able to post.

Please visit me next week when I return rejuvinated and full of new insight to share.

Thank you,
Gini Swancy

What to wear on a date

This question comes up so often that I thought it was time to write about it. Women email me all the time asking what they should wear on a date. Almost every time I hear the same thing. Women tell me that they want to look sexy, but not too sexy. They want to look dressed up, but not like they tried too hard. They want to look like themselves, but better. If you've dated recently you are probably laughing right now. I think we have all been there!



I find it so intriguing that we go through this to get ready for a date that I started asking men what they wanted to see. If we are getting dressed to impress them...shouldn't we find out what does it for them? The answers were the same most every time. Okay, there are a couple of exceptions, but I'll talk about them later.



Men say that the sexiest thing on a woman is confidence and a smile. Most men can give you an idea of what a woman was wearing, but not a real description. For example, if you ask my husband what I was wearing when he met me you will get a remarkable answer. He will tell you that I had on a navy, skirted suit and heels. Not bad, right? I mean, that was 12 years ago! Except, I had on a black, skirted suit. The suit was this fantastic long jacket and shorter skirt. I wore it with really sheer black nylons and a pair of kid leather pumps with a small bow on top. The jacket buttoned all the way up with five buttons and had a double collar. Okay, what I was wearing was way more important to me than it was to him.



If you ask him what he remembers about me he will tell you that he thought my smile lit up the room. He liked that I was confident and took the lead with my group (we met in a business setting). He will also tell you that he thought my eyes were beautiful and he couldn't get them out of his mind. These are the things that he fell for. These are the things that made me beautiful to him.



I'm telling you this because at that point and time I wasn't dressing for him. I was dressing for me. I wore things that made me feel like I could conquer the world. I remember shopping with my mother for weeks to prepare for this job. It was a really big deal and I wanted suits that were unique and reflected my personality (conservative with an edge). I managed to find five suits that were perfect.



So when you go on a date remember this. Dress for yourself. When you feel like you can conquer the world he will take notice. He will probably not be able to remember what you had on, but he will remember that you were confident and happy. But, there's more.



The one thing that you must pay attention to is grooming. Make sure that your nails are clean, shaped and that you are not wearing chipped polish. If you have on polish and it chips, take the time to take it off. Make sure that your clothes are clean and in good shape. Wear shoes that are in good shape and don't show excessive wear. Make sure that you wear a conservative amount of perfume. So many people are allergic to various scents. He probably will not notice the details (I mean, they are men!), but he will notice that you care for yourself. That makes it easier for him to care for you too.



Finally, I told you that there was an exception to the rule about what impresses a man. The main exception is situational. He may not care much about what you have on but if you are extremely out of place with what you are wearing he will probably notice. For example, if you are going to a five star restaurant you will want to skip the jeans. If you are going to a ballgame you will want to skip the dressy dress. Just be aware of what the norm is (especially for him) and follow that.



Happy dating, girls.

Just a little piece of the puzzle

I have been reading the book A New Earth. Yes, I jumped on the Oprah bandwagon and decided that it would be fun to be part of the biggest book club meeting ever! I have to admit, this is a hard read. I started the book and found that my mind was really wandering and had to start over. I am only to page 57 but something started to happening that I wanted to share with you.

The part of the book that I am at talks a lot about ego. How our ego is that little voice in our head that never seems to turn off. It causes us to over think things; spending time and energy trying to work through every situation. Eckhart Tolle gives us little exercises to do to just "be". This is the awareness of being a living thing. An awareness of being a life force. Heavy stuff.

So, I do the exercises. I focus on my hands....with my little voice in my head telling me how stupid this is. Never the less I just try to feel. Okay, I get the tingling in my hands and the voice in my head gets softer. How this is going to help me find my life purpose I have no idea, but I'm hanging in there.

When I get in the car, I put the top down. It is the first day that we have had glorious sun in so very long. My mind is completely quiet. I am just enjoying the feeling of the sun on my face and the wind in my hair. About 20 minutes later, it occurs to me that I was just "being". I was experiencing pure and complete bliss. I can't tell you how happy that made me feel.

As I was pulling into my neighborhood there was a couple walking and they stepped into the street just as I was making the turn. I just stopped and gave them a big smile. I mean, I feel great in this moment. Why not spread the feeling around. They both gave me big waves and smiles. It was an Ah Ha moment.

The positive energy that we create by "being" in our lives is actually just a little piece of the puzzle. Our positive energy flows to someone else and then their positive energy flows to someone else and then their positive energy flows to someone else. See how we can affect things on a greater level just by following our own bliss?

Plunging Necklines

I don't often write about specific products. If you read my blog very much you know that I spend a lot of time focusing on the inside and how it affects your appearance. That's why today's blog is quite a departure for me. I found something that you just have to know about.

I like necklines that are lower. I think that I look thinner when I show more chest. However, I am a pretty well endowed woman and have to be careful about how low the neckline goes because a bra just isn't optional. I have tried absolutely everything on the market for curvy girls who want plunging necklines and support. Absolutely nothing has worked to this point.

I have to confess that what I am about to tell you about wasn't even found by me. My husband saw this and brought it to my attention. Donna and I tease all the time that we have broken our husbands. They are way more in tune with how things fit a woman's body than any other man I have ever met! Anyway, here it is.

Dr. Rey's Shapewear Deep Plunge Bodysuit is available at Sears. It is very reasonbly priced and comes in black and nude. Here's the beauty of the item, though. It comes in sizes clear up to a 40DD. That means that full figure girls can get that sexy, plunge neckline with support! This is a first, girls.

There is a whole line of shapewear by Dr. Rey. He is the plastic surgeon from Dr. 90210 on the E Entertainment Network. Obviously he has spent a lot of time working with women's bodies. He knows their shape and how women feel about particular parts. He has done a good job of addressing those issues with his various shapewear pieces. You can see the entire line on his website.

This Keeps Coming Up

Since I started writing this blog I have said over and over that we have to be our own best friends, we have to love ourselves or we have to treat ourselves like we would the people in our lives. Everything that I write about is coming from experiences that I have recently had or conversations that I have been involved in or something in pop culture that triggers these thoughts. So, it isn't that I think I have to repeat myself to be heard. It is that the topic of being good to yourself is a common subject these days.

This time it came up in a conversation with a male friend of mine. A relationship that he was in recently ended. It ended badly and he was hurt. Over cocktails the other night he told me and my girlfriends about the situation. He was looking for some clarity...for some way to not hurt so bad. One of my girlfriends spent time working through what his exes actions meant in terms of communication. When they finished their conversation he said, "Yea, but what do I say if she calls?" Both of my girlfriends said, "She won't call." But, he said it again, "What if she does. I don't know what to say." I gave him my pearls of wisdom.

He called me yesterday and said that what really stuck with him was what I said. So here it is. I said to tell her that he loved her and cared deeply for her but that now it was time to love himself and take care of himself. That's it...don't say anymore. Get it out, get off the phone and then do it....take care of himself. He said that statement made him feel like it was possible to move on. What does this have to do with style?

As usual, I will say that the way you feel about yourself is reflected in how you look. Your opinion about yourself is the absolute first part of style. If you are hurt, rejected or abused in any way it will show in your demeanor and confidence; which then affects your appearance. The only....and I mean the only way to get back your confidence and beauty is to take care of yourself. Accept that whatever happened happened. It is what it is. Figure out what you need to start to heal and then do it!

A Man's Point of View

My husband copied me on an email that he sent to one of his associates today. It was just too good not to share with all of you. See, we are going on an annual award trip next week. We are there to help host the associates who have truly exceeded...busted....burned up goals over the past year. It is an honor to get to be with this extraordinary group.

Every year my husband is asked some question about appropriate attire. One year he had a manager ask if he really needed to wear a tuxedo. This was one of the first years...so when he told me what the question was I said, "Yes, a tuxedo should be worn...it is an opportunity for the spouses, partners or friends to get dressed up and the company actually provides a tux if necessary. This is when all of your peers get to applaud you for a job more than well done. This is not the time to be underdressed!" Since that year, my husband has been all over the appropriate dress subject.

So, as usual, a comment about attire came up today. One of his associates told another that I was into fashion so choose their dress with that in mind. The associate, in good humor, sent my husband an email telling him how excited she was and that she was putting a lot of thought into her dress. She didn't want me to judge it poorly. Here is what he wrote back:

"One correction on my wife, Gini. Fashion is her passion and her business, but she is never critical. She does say that this is your shinning moment, so FEEL good about yourself! Safe travels and see you there!"

How fabulous is that! He totally understands that if you feel good....you look good. It has taken some time, but if he can get it, everyone can get it. So, if you are one of those women who says to yourself all the time that you are not attractive, or have things to hide....stop it! When you feel good....you will look good.

My Bathing Suit Battle

The time has come that I will be traveling to a tropical destination with over 500 other people. Each year my husband's company has an award trip. The first year it was in Banff. I was overcome with joy. I can ski with the best of them and look good doing it. Every year since the trip has been to a warm weather destination.

Every year I get about 2 weeks out and panic about a bathing suit. It's not that I don't like water. I love the ocean....lying by the pool...even the water parks. I panic about the suit because I don't want to miss out on the fun because I am self conscious about the tiny piece of lycra that I am wearing. So, my husband, who is completely sympathetic, said let's go shopping yesterday. He totally gets that I don't want to do this, but will hate it if I want to go to the pool and am unprepared.

We head out to the mall. I don't care if I get a suit that costs $25 or $250 as long as it covers my bum and hold my boobs up where they belong (of course without being so tight that I have extra boobs under my arms). As we walk through Macy's I chastise myself for not ordering a Lori Coulter suit 2 months ago. I could have had a suit that was custom made for my body, in the color of my choice, and in the price range that I have set for this venture. But, alas, the denial that I have been saturated in cost me the time that it takes to get one of these delicious suits.

I finally end up buying 2 suits to take home and struggle into in the privacy of my locked bathroom. I put the first one on and it isn't half bad. It doesn't fit perfectly but it meets my two criteria...bum is covered...girls are mid way between my shoulders and elbows. I walk out and my husband says it is fabulous (gotta love this man). I don't leave the bathroom with the second suit.

Never-the-less, I am covered. I can lay by the pool or float down the lazy river and not feel like there are girl parts falling out all over the place. I remember the time that my husband and I played in the water park at the Grand Wailea in Hawaii all day. We laughed, we turned the wheel on the water elevator like crazy and we swung into the lagoon on a rope swing. There was also the time in Jamaica where we layed on rafts in the pool all afternoon, holding hands so we wouldn't drift apart, and talked like we hadn't in ages. I would have missed those moments if I had neglected to get a suit at all.

I bring this up because I don't know a woman who doesn't hate buying a bathing suit. Okay, there are the very young and supple or the genetically altered, but other than them....most of us hate bathing suits. As I go through the emotions of having to squeeze into one and show myself in public, my husband reminds me that the most beautiful he has ever seen me is when I laugh uncontrollably or relax completely and just succumb to life.

Live out loud, take all the opportunities and to hell with worrying about the tiny lycra!!

Live Like You Were Dying

Almost everyone that I know has heard the Tim McGraw song Live Like You Were Dying. If you haven't heard this song, I encourage you to watch the embedded video.

Most people don't have any idea when they will die. Would you even want to know? But, if you did, would you do things differently? I bring this up because it does have relevance to your personal style.

I'll get back to personal style in a minute. If you read my blog very often you know that I write more about your appearance and self confidence in terms of how you feel about yourself than I do about actual style tips. Every day something happens that guides what the blog will be about that day. Today I got an email from a good friend who works with a Midwest charitable organization. The video below was in her email. I encourage you to take 12 minutes and watch this video. It could very well change your life....or at least the way you live it!


I won't spend time commenting on this clip. It says everything that anyone needs to know about living. But, I do want to bring it back around to your personal style.

Every day I meet women who hate the way they look. They worry about what to wear (haven't we all been there) and what people think about them. Sometimes I meet women who are so concerned about how they look that they have forgotten to continue to live while they work on their appearance. This isn't actually all that unusual.

We've all said or heard another woman say that she will have a better life or be happy when...she loses weight, has plastic surgery, gets better clothes, gets a designer handbag. The list goes on and on. She may even be visibly unhappy...waiting for that magic thing that will change the way she feels.

Here is the hard lesson. There is no magic bullet. Nothing that you can buy (with possibly the exception of therapy) can make you a happy, confident person. Living your life, following your dreams and having fun are the things that will make you beautiful. Your personal style starts on the inside. All of the beautiful things in the world and all of the plastic surgery in the world can not make a woman beautiful on its own. She has to have a life that shines through first.

If you are in a place that feels hopeless or ugly, please take the time today to count your blessings, dream a little and give yourself a break. If you are in a good place, please take the time to count your blessings, dream a little and laugh out loud. That is where beauty begins.

Mirror, mirror on the wall...

How do you feel when you look in the mirror? Do your eyes immediately travel to what you think are your flaws? Do you ever look in the mirror and see you as a whole? The good...the great....the unique?

I find it interesting that we reduce ourselves to our parts. We look at our arms and wish that they didn't wiggle so much. We look at our tummies and remember when they were flat. And our breats! We wish they were bigger, firmer, smaller...whatever! But, when was the last time you looked in the mirror and said something like, "Hey, gorgeous, you look fabulous today!"

That's what each and every one of us should be doing. I love the song Stronger Woman by Jewel. She says in her lyrics:

I'm going to love myself
more than anyone else
Believe in me
even if someone can't see a
stronger woman in me
I'm gonna be my own best friend
stick with me to the end...

Women have a tendency to treat others better than they do themselves. We don't reduce others to parts.

We generally see a person as a whole. And, as we get to know and like them, we don't notice flaws. So, we know and hopefully like ourselves. What if today you give yourself a break? Be your own best friend. Tell yourself the great things that you like about you. Look in the mirror and say, "Girlfriend, you are having a spectacular hair day."

Try it on for size. Believe in you as a whole person today. Be the Stronger Woman!!

A behind the scenes look at the apparel market

I wanted to share a little behind the scenes action with you about how we buy clothes for our website. Previously, we showed our members outfits pulled together from various retailers. But, we were frustrated at the way the clothes actually fit as opposed to what we saw on the models on the retailers websites. So, we decided to increase our level of service and go straight to the source for the clothes that we show.

As you know, we are mostly concerned about what looks great on real women's shapes. We are also concerned about clothing fitting the peronality of our members. With all of this in mind Donna and I visited the Dallas and Las Vegas apparel markets in search of just the right items. Armed with our chart of what we were looking for, tape measures, camera and American Express....off we went.

Dallas was our first market. The women's apparel show is located in the Dallas Market Center. Many of the showrooms are permanent and you can visit them once a month. Therefore, you get maps with showroom names and the brands they carry. Of coure, there are some temporary booths there for the show. But all in all this is a very organized and easy experience. We would visit a showroom, lay things out to measure them, ask the models to try things on, try things on ourselves and make decisions based first on fit and then on style. We came home feeling elated with our purchases. Once we filled in the spaces on our chart we discovered how little we really bought. But we were there for 3 whole days and spend 12 hours a day buying clothes! How could we have gotten so little?

We quickly made reservations for Las Vegas. When we got the information about the shows in Vegas, we found out that they were spread all over the city. If you wanted lower priced clothes you had to go to the Sand's, contemporary sportswear and accessories at the Convention Center, better sportswear at the Rio, and the designer show at the World Market Center. There were other shows, but they weren't related to women's apparel (thank God!). We sat down over a stiff drink and made a plan. We had four days to get everything we needed to fill the gaps from Dallas and to help our members dress their shape and style.



We hit the Off Price Market the first day looking for bargain accessories. We saw some of the same items at this show as we had seen in Dallas. But, it was kind of like sample sale shopping. People were grabbing up great deals and negotiating like it was the floor of the stock exchange. You had to be quick or lose your chance at the awesome deals available. We thought about a couple of pieces and they were sold out before we could make our minds up. Don't fret though....we got a lot of fabulous steals at this show. Then we were off to the MagicShow.

I don't mean that we were off to see David Copperfield (darn it). Magic is the big women's apparel show at the Convention Center. We changed direction at this show and decided to just make the purchases when we saw the items. We didn't want to risk losing the opportunity for great finds again. We made some big discoveries quickly...and ones that could impact the ability to show you how things would work together for your shape and style.

1. You really have to watch the delivery dates or you will have things being delivered at way different times and they won't be available to make an outfit



2. You have to ask if the piece you are looking at is just a sample or not. Some things will actually have big changes that cannot be anticipated. If the piece is a sample...we just walk away so that our members aren't disappointed.



3. Finally, you have to make sure that what you are seeing comes in the same exact fabric. At market, the showrooms will often use one piece to show shape and several others to show fabric. It is imperative that you pay attention to these kinds of details when ordering.

This may sound like a lot goes into getting items into a store, but, it is even bigger than that. At each show there may be anywhere from 600-4000 showrooms. Each showroom may rep several designers. By the time market is over a buyer has seen thousands and thousands of items.

No matter how many items there may be, Donna and I are dedicated to bringing you clothes that work for your individual shape and personal style.

Out of the Office

Donna and I are in Las Vegas shopping for fabulous looks just for the real woman. We will be back on our regular schedule of posting next week.

Have a fanatastic week and come back on Monday!

Travel Clothes

Donna and I are in Las Vegas for the Magic Market. This is where buyers from all over the world come to shop for department stores, boutiques, specialty shops...really the whole gammet. There are actually over 8 different markets going on right now. It is the biggest shopping venue I have ever seen!

The reason that I tell you this is that Donna and I spend 12-16 hours a day on our feet walking miles and miles and digging through tons of clothing, handbags and accessories. It is a physically gruelling day, no way around it. But, by the same token, it is a fashion mecca. So, when you travel, then spend your time walking a bunch, how do you stay looking cute?

I thought I would share a couple of our travel tips. I know that when you travel you probably think comfort first. That is fine...I do the same thing. However, you don't want to end up in sweats all the time. I always pack a great pair of knit pants in black. You just can't go wrong with black pants and at least the knit won't wrinkle and it will feel like sweats!

You can get great knits at any price point. If you don't want to invest a lot, try Newport News in their FX line. If you want to spend a little more for something that is great looking and washable try Misook. If you have a lot more to spend, there is always St. John (go for the Sport line). You can wear virtually any top with black pants and look polished.

Okay, so your dressed, now the big question, "What do I wear for shoes?" At market we see everything from tennis shoes to Danko clogs. Truth is that everyone has a different tolerance for walking in shoes all day long. Cute shoes lose their appeal when you see a woman limping around in them. If you can wear a flat all day, there are some fabulous, fashion tennis shoes that are dressy enough to wear with black knit pants. Look for Sketchers, Puma or RocketDog. I like mules in plain black. I found a pair of Nickels that are comfortable to walk all day in. Donna is wearing a pair of Bear Traps mules. Let your feet be your guide, just avoid white, workout tennis shoes with your black pants.

Well, we are off to shop for all of you. We will be back on our regular schedule of posting next week!!

Hurt Feelings

This morning as I sit down to write my blog it is a little harder than usual. You see, I got my feelings hurt this morning and I am honestly having a hard time letting it go. I think it hurt so much because someone commented on an outfit that I wore that they didnt' think was good for someone in my position. I don't know who said it because the comment came to me third hand. I really liked that outfit and I don't know that I agree with the comment, but it still had an impact on my confidence.

What I will say is that no matter what a person wears, someone is always going to find fault in it. You can never please all of the people all of the time. You have to dress for you. When you look in the mirror, you have to be pleased by what you see. The reason for this is that confidence comes from that place inside. And, no matter how many people tell you that you look great, unless you believe it, you just won't show confidence. Bottom line, confidence is what makes a woman beautiful.

So, why do I tell you that someone else was able to hurt me and rock my confidence today? It's honest. I try and share with you observations and opinions that I think will help you. I want you to know that every one of us are vulnerable about our appearance. I have met very few women who don't feel self conscious about some part of the way they look. The point of what anatomyofstyle.com does is to help you love what you see in the mirror so that you can feel your best and project confidence. For me, our methods work 95% of the time. But, and this is important, NO ONE has perfect looks all the time.

Unfortunately, other people's opinions often do make a difference in how we feel. Therefore, I want to ask you to do something (if you aren't already doing it)....unless someone asks, don't share your thoughts about their appearance. It isn't fair to us, as women, to be torn down by someone's good intentions. Of course there is always an exception. If you see another woman who hasn't noticed that her top has come down below her breasts, by all means, give her a heads up. But, if what you want to say is just an opinion about not liking what she is wearing....keep it to yourself.

Who are you?

Many of you know that we are posting the "Secrets of Mastering Personal Style" on our member site. As each segment is completed, we are giving our members the unique opportunity to go through the segment, review it and tell us their stories. In order to get the segments out there in a timely manner, I have started dedicating one day a week to do nothing but write.

Yesterday, as I was working on the segment, "Know Thyself", I really had the chance to reflect on the evolution of women. In today's society, more than ever before, women are wearing numerous hats. Many of us have roles that number in the teens and twenties. We are daughters, sisters, wives, mothers, friends, employees, caregivers, coaches, parishoners, teammates...the list goes on and on. So, does that give you any idea as to why women are feeling confused about their personal style?

It's natural for someone to feel that they are one person one minute and another person ten minutes later when that really is the case. Imagine if you work in a corporate atmosphere. Maybe you wear a conservative suit to the office. At 5:30 you find yourself dashing to your child's school to coach their soccer team. By 7:00 you are whipping up a healthy meal for you family. And, finally by 9:00 you are sitting down with you husband to hear about his day and try and connect. You have your corporate conservative style, your sporty, soccer mom style (which luckily works in the kitchen too) and finally you have a sexier, softer style for connecting with you husband. Well, in theory that's how this works.

In reality, you are dressing down at work so that you can just slip your jacket off and walk onto the soccer field. And, odds are at 9:00 you are wearing one of your husband's big, old tshirts. How does that affect your life? You may not think that it does, but research shows that there is a tremendous impact to your psychi which impacts your life.

That's why it is important to us to share the research with you and to show you what a difference your appearance can make in your life. Something as simple as knowing what makes you feel your absolute best can increase your confidence and productivity.

If you are a member and are going through the "Secrets of Mastering Personal Style" program, we are anxious to hear about your personal challenges and how you have been able to improve the way you feel by applying our principles.

If you are not a member, "Secrets of Mastering Personal Style" will be available for purchase later this year. The only way to get it now is to become a member!!

Who doesn't love a compliment?

I was going into the grocery store in late December when a lovely woman dressed in an animal print jacket and black slacks walked out. As I went by I told her that she looked fabulous! She was so cute...she was standing there waiting for her husband to pick her up. She took me over to the car and introduced me and told her husband what I said. She said that she hadn't received a compliment from a stranger in ages.

It ocurred to me that her reaction gave me as much pleasure as I hope my compliment gave her. It made me want to give compliments more often. It is at that point that I started to consciously look around and comment whenever I saw a woman who was wearing something "wow" or just looked great. I've always commented...it just hasn't always been out loud. I can't even begin to tell you how fun this has become.

My husband and I were having our ritual, late weekend breakfast this past Sunday when a woman walked by with a lovely scarf. I told her how beautiful it was as she passed by. She looked surprised, then she looked down to see what she was wearing and finally she broke into a huge grin and thanked me profusely. What do you think happened? I felt good all morning long! I kept thinking that maybe it was just what she needed that morning too.

You know, it doesn't cost us anything to compliment another woman. The women that we see around us don't have to be tall, thin, young, sexy or even completely pulled together to find something attractive about them. Imagine if you had the power to build someone up every day and make her day a little bit better. Well, YOU DO!

I want to issue a challenge to everyone who reads this. Take notice. Look around and see the beautiful handbags, scarves, shoes, jewelry, hairstyles, outfits or even personal features. When you see them, just make a short, nice comment about how lovely they are. Try doing this at least once a day. Watch the pleasure that spreads across the recipients face when she receives that compliment. Notice the warmth that spreads through your heart when you give that compliment.

Have a wonderful and beautiful week. Let us know what you experience.

Girlfriends

I have lived in St. Louis for almost 6 years. It is the longest that I have ever lived anywhere in one stretch (when from college to Mom and Dad's several times). The reason I tell you this is that it takes awhile to integrate into a community and figure out where you fit in. I have a few close girlfriends from high school and college. But, as an adult, I have not had a lot of girlfriends until now.

Today I went to an EWomen Network lunch (as I do every month) and after the meeting a few girls came up to see where we were going afterwards. It has just become our habit to hang out after and catch up. I was so touched that I was included in the circle of girlfriends...I just haven't been anywhere long enough to automatically be part of a group.

As we were sitting around the table, chatting, laughing and really connecting I sat back and reflected on how beautiful all of these women were. Every single one of them are different. They have different jobs, different ages, different personalities....the list goes on and on. But, as I watched them, sometimes laughing until they cried, I thought how this moment is one of those moments that makes a woman beautiful. The moment that she is enjoying, embracing and connecting with other women.

Another woman, who I hope becomes a girlfriend, told me recently that she met a woman in France that had such grace and elegance. She shared with me a story about how she studied this woman to see what it was that was so attractive and made her so elegant. At the end of the trip, the women from America decided that the French woman's grace came from her ability to savor and enjoy the moment. She wasn't rushed or putting on airs. She does the things that she does because she understands the value of the journey.

I tell you this because that is what I saw today. Beautiful, graceful women who for the moment were "in the moment". My wish for you is that you can take the time to laugh with your girlfriends and not worry about what comes next.

Working From Home

In my many involvements in women's organizations, charity work and social events I have had the opportunity to meet numerous women who work from home. Let's face it, the home office is a huge reality of the 21st century workforce. The question is what to wear when you are working in a home office.

I haven't met a woman yet who has told me that she gets up in the morning and gets ready just like she was going into a corporate office. She isn't putting on a suit and wearing heels into her home office. Sometimes these same women admit that they are actually wearing sweats a lot of days and look like something that the cat drug in. I can relate.

When Donna and I first moved into our office, we had weeks that we were unpacking, hanging pictures, moving more stuff in daily and moving the office furniture around regularly. We spent those first couple of weeks in sweats or jeans and a t-shirt. I started to notice what it was doing to my performance.

Every day I would come in with a list of things that I absolutely had to accomplish and somewhere around mid day I would realize that I hadn't gotten close to getting it all done. I would find myself slumping in my chair and not really feeling motivated or energized. I was talking to my business coach one day and I told her that I just really didn't feel like the CEO of a company that had accomplished so much in such a short time. She immediately asked me what I was wearing. What?

She said, "You heard me...what are you wearing?" I got quiet...I mean, you don't want to admit that you have on an old pair of jeans and a sweatshirt when you are a trained professional in personal image. I slowly told her what I was wearing. She asked me if that was what I imagined CEO's of successful companies wore. Obviously, the answer is no.

Our office is somewhat like a home away from a home. We are waiting for our space to be built out so our developer put us in a residential loft for the time being. We don't need to wear suits and heels. But, it is appropriate to wear something that makes us feel like we are the position that we are in.

These days you are more likely to find Donna and I in a dressy pair of jeans with a nice shirt and a jacket. When we leave the office during the day, we aren't embarassed if someone asks what we do. As a matter of fact, we want to tell people what we do!

So, if you have gotten into a slump and are wearing your pj's or sweats until noon. Make a point of getting up and putting on something that makes you feel fabulous. See what a difference it makes in your day and let us know. We love to share your stories!!

Designer Head to Toe?

An interesting question that I get asked a lot is where do I shop. People want to know if I have favorite designers or boutiques. Most people assume that I do the majority of my shopping in high end department stores and small specialty stores. This assumption is based on the fact that I spend so much time immersed in the fashion industry.

Well, I'm about to punch a hole in that illusion. I shop everywhere. What I buy is more about the shape and style of the piece than the name on the label. Whatever I buy has to make sense in my overall wardrobe plan and it has to have an attractive cost per wearing.
Yesterday I wore a gold turtleneck from Walmart, a fabulous Vera by Vera Wang jacket from Kohl's and a pair of St. John knit pants. I accessorized with an antique pin that was my grandmothers, earrings from the gold souk in Dubai and Stuart Weizman boots. If there was ever an outfit with diverse price points...this was it. So what made me decide on each of these pieces?

• The turtleneck was around $17.00. I figure that this time of year I will wear it about once a week. It looks great with this little black velour jogging suit, my jeans, my business suits. It is a great top. If I wear it for the entire season (Nov.- March), I will most likely get 12-15 wearings out of this top. That makes it somewhere in the range of $1.40-$1.13 per wearing. I really think that this top will only last one season.
  
• The jacket was approximately $52.00. It is a substantial fabric that will last at least two seasons. Again, it goes with slacks, jeans and is even cute thrown over a dress. I can get away with wearing this jacket at least once a week, maybe even two (it is a neutral navy). It has a little longer season to it because the fabric can transition into Spring. I will be able to wear it all the way through May. Therefore, my cost per wearing looks like this 30 weeks x 1.5 wearings per week (some weeks 1...some weeks 2) = 45 wearings a year, for 2 years = 90 wearings. $52/90 = $.58!! What a bargain.
  
• The pants were St. John knit and I got them on sale for $210. Now, this might sound like a lot, but I just can't find pants that fit well without having them severely altered. They can actually make the alterations on St. John fairly easily because of the simple construction. These are basic black, high quality and will last me for at least five years (I am already into my second year with these pants and they look brand new). I wear them at least twice a week during Fall, Winter and Spring. Therefore, my cost per wearing looks like this 36 weeks x 2 wearings per week = 72 wearings per year, for 5 years = 360. $210/360 = $.58!! Can you believe that they are the same value as the $52 jacket?
  
• My jewelry is always something with some sentiment attached. My grandmother's broach wasn't ever an expensive piece, but it looks great and it makes me think of my beautiful, stylish grandma. The earrings were a gift from my mother. She picked them up on her most exotic trip ever and I like to think of her bargaining with the gold dealers in the souk
  in Dubai.
  
• The Stuart Weizman boots? Expensive!!! I looked for black, wedge boots all over town...on the internet...everywhere! My husband and I saw them in Neiman Marcus one weekend and I think I left a trail of drool as I passed through the shoe department. If they end up being anything like my brown wedge boots, I will literally wear the soles off of them within the year! The cost per wearing? Yet to be determined, but I do feel sassy every time I put them on so it was worth every penny.

Next time you go shopping think of how a piece will look on you and what it will really cost you to wear it. Don't ever shop labels just for the sake of putting someone else's name on your back. Shop to make yourself look your best regardless of price. You will feel like a million bucks, even if you are only wearing $100!!

What's Hot for Spring 2008

You may have noticed that there hasn't been a blog for a couple of days. Donna and I were in Dallas at the apparel market. We have decided to carry clothing, handbags, shoes and accessories ourselves. While department stores have a lot to choose from, they just don't serve the needs of all our members. Therefore, we decided to go right to the source and get what our members want directly. I'll give you a little preview of what we saw.

What we saw was lots of shine, bling, shimmer and comfort. It seems that the shinier and brighter the better for spring. And we don't just mean shiny black or white. No, you are going to be seeing a lot of bright, primary color patent leather bags, shoes and even some clothing. If it is linen this season...odds are that it will have metallic threads running through it. And Swarovski must be working overtime with all the crystals that we saw on things. Even Haviana sandals (the traditional beach flip flop) has gotten in the game with blingy, beach sandals.

Not only are you seeing lots of bling and shine, but things are big. Bags are bigger than ever. You should be able to get everything you usually carry in your purse plus your gym clothes in the new over sized bags! Clothes are still big and roomy. We saw numerous swing jackets in every fabric that you can imagine. Tops had a tendency to be full around the middle and hips. Many of the dresses are that straight 70's look (complete with the bright graphic fabric). Of course, there are always exceptions which is how we can still each have our own personal style. I am happy to report that Donna and I were able to buy things that fit every shape of body and will flatter the woman wearing it.

As far as accessories go, it is still big and blingy. Belts are huge this Spring. This is great news because you can belt some of those larger tops and dresses to show off a tiny waist. The belts are wide and have interesting best buckles. Some of the belts we saw were so wide that they looked like girdles! Fashion jewelry is still a big trend. Acrylic bracelets, dangle earrings and long crystal necklaces seem to be every where. Of course, the key is still understanding how to pull your accessories together with your outfit. But, not to worry, that's what we're here for.

You will begin to see the items that we picked up at market on our website in early March. We can't wait to hear what you think of our picks!

$1 Cosmetics

I recently discovered a brand of make up that sells everything for $1.00. That's not a typo....they really do sell everything for a dollar. Now, I think that you can find some treasures in dollar stores. But, for the most part...it's stuff that no one wanted to buy at regular price. I expected the same to be true for the $1.00 makeup. But, what did I have to lose ($1?) to try it out!!

I ordered $27.00 worth of cosmetics from . That's a lot of makeup when you are only paying $1 for each item. The goal, of course, was to try it so that I could make a recommendation or not. Well, the big box of goodies was delivered to the office yesterday. I came in this morning with a clean face. After saying good morning to the staff, I went in and "put on my face."

When I came out, I asked what they thought. I got.....looks great.....your skin looks fabulous....did you change mascaras....love the lip color!! So, I liked it when I put it on and the staff thought it looked great. Why am I spending more than $27.00 on one tube of mascara?

I can tell you that I liked most of the products, but I loved a couple. The eyelash curler (yes, it was $1.00) is fantastic! It works better than all the others that I have tried. It has a wonderful handle that makes it easier to apply the right pressure. The lip pencil and gloss is the most natural and long lasting that I have tried. The concealer is as good as the one that I spend a large amount of money on. It all had a clean, citrusy smell to it.

So, what is the down side? For the most part, the quantity is small. Maybe that is how they got the Elf brand name. If you are ordering mascara or lip gloss (things that go faster than the rest of your makeup) you will have to order more frequently. That's it!!! Otherwise, I think the product is great.

Whether you are a makeup aficionado or not, this is a great way to try new things. If you only wear makeup on special occasions...what a fabulous way to get a little and not pay an arm and a leg. I encourage everyone to give Elf a whirl!!

How to Look Good Naked

The tides have finally turned. I am so ecstatic to report that there is a style show about the inside first and then the outside. The Lifetime Network and Carson Kressley have hit it out of the ballpark with their new show How to Look Good Naked.

Donna watched the first episode and couldn't say enough wonderful things about it. I just hadn't gotten around to watching it until last night (thank God for TiVo). I watched the first two episodes...absolutely riveted to the set. It's perfect!

Carson takes average women, who are having self esteem issues (who isn't), and proves to them that their body perceptions are off. They have to strip down to their underwear (on national tv...yikes) and then they have to start talking about their bodies. I believe their words, their perceptions are shared by millions of women all over the nation. We all have self doubts. Carson lets them get it all out and then he helps them to see the positive aspects of their bodies. He does this by posting a GIGANTIC picture of them (sans the head to protect their identity) on the side of a building and asking strangers to tell him what they think.

Of course, the women think that the negative comments have been edited out....don't we all think that way. So, in the end, Carson has the women themselves asking strangers how they look naked. It is liberating to see them gain confidence and feel beautiful. Its also interesting to hear people say that they think the average body is beautiful. Hmmmmm....I think maybe we have been brainwashed a little too long.

The best part of this show is that the women get a foundation overhaul, a couple of outfits that fit well, a little makeup and a new hairstyle. That's it!! No months of dieting and unrealistic exercise. No major surgery. No negative comments about how they currently look. It is all good.

Carson, you are absolutely what we have been waiting for. Keep helping women feel fabulous!!! Oh, and by the way, you are fabulous too.

Beauty in a Deeper Sense

I was speaking to a woman this morning who said something so moving that I wanted to share it with you all. This is a woman who I have great admiration for and she is 150% heart. So, when this conversation started it frustrated me for a minute. We were talking about my company, http://www.anatomyofstyle.com/, moving into the retail sector.

I was giving her the low down on what Donna and I expect when we go to market next week. She was telling me about a class that she recently took from another consultant. We got on the conversation of size and why the apparel industry doesn't make attractive clothing for larger women readily available. That's when she started telling me that she used to be smaller.... I don't have to finish that sentence because we have all used it or heard it. That's where I get frustrated.

Why, as women, do we feel the need to tell people that we used to be smaller, are in the process of losing weight, have a medical problem? Whatever the reason....why do we feel that people will respond to us differently if we make them understand that we don't choose to be larger than the average 15 year old in magazines? Like I said, the frustration was momentary. Here comes the really beautiful part.

This woman told me that she gained weight when she was going through chemo. Ouch, I feel like a big jerk. Then she said the most beautiful thing. She said that when she talked about her weight to her husband, his reply was, "you're here, that's all that matters." He understood the blessing that it was to have her to love another day. He understood that her beauty transcends her body. His response to her was simply moving.

I will tell you that I haven't met many women that I think are more beautiful than this woman. Every thought that goes through her head is about how she can help someone else. She has a servant's heart and she is good at helping people to get what they need. I personally think that this earth would lose a little of its beauty without her. I would like to think that we could begin to value spirit beauty over aesthetic beauty and stop feeling like we have to justify our bodies.

Donna and I want to make sure that our company is a balance between celebrating the beauty that doesn't readily show with providing you with resources to make the outside match the inside. As we head off to market for the first time, it is people like this woman that we will think about. Every one, regardless of shape and size, should feel beautiful and never feel like they need to explain why they look a certain way. God Bless every one of the beautiful women on this earth.

Is there such a thing as exercise style?

We talk a lot about style in terms of clothing, hair, makeup and accessories. But, is there such a thing as an exercise style? Is the form of exercise that we choose saying something about who we are? I think that the answer is...Yes, absolutely.

My mother started a line dancing class as a form of exercise. It is a perfect reflection of who she is and her personal style. She is fun, light and a little goofy. The line dancing class is fun, light and (according to her) her dancing is a little goofy.

So, I took a look at the exercise that I have chosen for myself and asked myself if it really reflected who I am. I mean, in truth, I hate exercise! I started to ask if I was setting myself up for failure because what I have chosen to do is a huge undertaking.

I decided that I wanted to train for a triathlon (a half, really). I am running, biking and swimming on a regular basis. When I really start to analyze whether this is something that I can achieve it occurred to me that this is exactly the type of exercise challenge that I need. I have a definite start date and end date. There is a tangible, date driven goal in place so that I can measure my success on a timeline. It is completely in line with my personal style.

Exercise programs that I have tried in the past that haven't worked are not in line with my personal style. Going to a gym, exercise classes, team sports and other exercise endeavors just don't fit my personality. I need a personal, tough challenge that I can tackle with a tangible outcome. I need something that makes me feel strong and in control. I need something that is diverse in what I do.

So, I'm sure that many of you have resolved to get in shape this year. And, I'm sure, many of you...like myself, have failed your resolutions in the past. To be successful this year, really take a look at the plan that you are working and make sure that your personal style is being satisfied with your exercise plan.

Your Best Face Forward

This weather is doing a real number on my skin. Keeping it from being dry and chapped is a challenge when the wind blows and it is so cold. Especially after skiing over the Christmas holiday. Since I have been hearing the same thing from women all over the country, I thought that I would share with you how I am overcoming the winter dull skin syndrome.

If you have every had a microdermabrasion then you will know what I mean when I say that they can be addicting. As the name would suggest, a "micro" dermabrasion (done correctly) will leave your skin polished and smooth. There isn't any down time and you shouldn't peel after. You will have baby smooth skin that glows. Microdermabrasions can run anywhere between $150-$250 depending on where you go. If you are in the market for something less expensive, there are other options.

Any type of exfoliating product is going to help slough off the dead skin and let your healthier skin shine through. There are a few at home microdermabrasion options you can try.


Neutrogena Advanced Solutions At Home MicroDermabrasion System
Fresh Appleseed Resurfacing Kit

Once you have exfoliated, you have to replenish your skin. The moisturizer that you use has to be based on your skin type. I am very dry and need something that is super moisturizing. If you have oily skin you will probably want something a little lighter. Below are a couple of options for replenishing moisture.

La Roche Posay Nutritic Emulsion 2.5% 1.35
Awake Direct Nutrition Moisturizer

Whatever products you choose to use remember the following steps:

Cleanse using tepid or cool water (hot water is drying)
Exfoliate (at home or in a spa, but get that dead skin off)
Moisturize (for day use and spf and at night something to replenish your skin)

Women, Let's Mentor

Last Friday I attended an EWomen Network luncheon and the speaker was Cindy Erickson of Innolect, Inc. She talked to us about women in the workforce and compared it to the play Wicked.

If you have seen the play then you know that the message is that things are not always what they seem. We have to look behind the curtain and find the truth. The truth is that women are still not equal in the workforce.

We have decades of fighting our way to the top and yet we still aren't there. Did you know that there are still only eight female CEOs in Fortune 500 companies? Megan Dowd writes for Fox news, "...statistics show that although women have made some strides over time in the corporate arena, too many have simply been running in place. The majority of women employed at Fortune 500 companies have been getting stuck at the bottom of the leadership totem pole over the last decade, according to a census study released in 2006 by Catalyst, an organization that tracks women in business."

So, what is it that makes us different than men? What makes us incapable of rising to the top of the corporate ladder? In her presentation on Friday, Erickson said that women have not adopted the mentor mentality that men have. Of course, there are other contributing factors to why men rise to the top faster, but this is a point that cannot and should not be ignored.

What is the underlying reason that we don't mentor and take that new girl under our wings? Maybe it is that newer models for the female gender seem better some how. Where men are seen as wiser and more capable at an older age, women are not necessarily in the same boat. Many women have taken time away from their careers to raise families. They may have a break in their rise to the top. So, what can we do?

We must....and I mean must, begin to build bonds across the generations. Women who have been in the workforce and figured a few things out must take a younger woman under her wing. We must begin to create strong networks that help us launch each other into a new level.

What does this have to do with beauty and style? Everything!! We cannot be women of grace, style, poise and beauty if we are ugly inside. When we join hands and work together we are undefeatable. We are strong and beautiful and can do anything.

In the coming months we will be issuing a challenge to be or find a mentor. We hope that you will take up the gauntlet and join us in our quest to be better women (to each other) in the workplace. Keep checking our site for details.

Beauty is More Than Skin Deep

When you think of beauty, what comes to mind? Is it the features of a person...their accessories...the way they dress? It could be a combination of things that makes them beautiful. We do tend to look at beauty as a surface thing. If we want to look more beautiful we will get a new outfit or try something different with our hair. I had an experience today that proved to me that beauty is much deeper than our skin.

I was recently introduced to a massage therapist who does vibration massage. I have all kinds of trouble with my back, shoulders, neck, etc. I am willing to go to anyone to try and get relief from the pain. So, of course, I go in looking for a therapeutic massage that will temporarily relieve the stress in my back.

Nancy, the therapist, started out by doing some muscle testing to see where the problems were with my body. I didn't tell her anything about what was going on, but she told me exactly what the issue was and she was right! Next she played a quartz crystal singing bowl. This is a deep vibration that sends energy through your body. Then, we got to the massage.

I have never been on a massage table that vibrated, but this one did. There were several different vibrations going on. There was the table and then there were two smaller machines that she could position over trouble areas. In addition to the work that the table was doing, Nancy was working my muscles. She kept hitting spots that she called hurkles. This is for tickles, but hurts. She would work on them until they no longer hurt and tickled.

The beauty part comes at the end. After I got dressed she had me stand in front of the mirror. I was standing taller than I have in years. My posture was fabulous and I didn't have any pain! I am astounded at how feeling so good translating into looking so terrific today.

What am I saying? Go get a fantastic, therapeutic massage before you buy a new outfit. You might find that what you owns fits better when you have great posture.

The Secrets of Mastering Personal Style

Donna and I will be announcing soon the release of our new program, "The Secrets of Mastering Personal Style". We have found that there are definite things that women (who have fantastic personal style) do, think, feel and wear. We have seen patterns emerge over the years as we have worked with women one on one. We are finally in a position to bring that information to you.

I am so excited about this program. It is a program full of information, but the best part is that it will have tangible tasks to perform to get yourself into the position to execute your own fabulous personal style. And, to keep your personal style a constant in your life.

The chapters (as they are outlined today) are:

Know Thyself
Clean Canvas
Color by the Numbers
Getting Ready to Get Stylish
Wardrobe Genie
Its All in the Plan
Topping off your Wardrobe with Great Hair
Accessorize Yourself
The Shoe Fairy
Comfortable in your Skin
Style Comes in All Shapes and Sizes
Shop, but don't Drop
Style for a Lifetime

The program will have a workbook that gives you all of the tools you need to get through the tasks outlines in the program and keep your information together. After going through the program you will be able to achieve chic, easy, unique style.

Our members are going to get installments from "The Secrets of Mastering Personal Style" directly on their member site. The benefit to our members is that we are making the program available to them long before it is actually publishes. Once the program is published, the entire program will be available to members at a lower member price.

We can't wait to get this program in the hands of women everywhere. "The Secrets of Mastering Personal Style" is designed to help you get your style down to a science and get on with living your life.

Cashmere Mafia

I know...it is crazy to spend time watching something as mindless as Cashmere Mafia. But, I watch these shows with you, the women who follow our blog, in mind. I want to see what Hollywood thinks fabulous, stylish women (in the real world) wear. So, last night I sat down and watched the ABC pilot of Cashmere Mafia about 4 executive women in New York.

I found it interesting that the women depicted in the show didn't really adhere to latest fashions. They all have different body types and jobs in different industries and the clothes that they wore seemed to mimic their needs vs. follow the latest trends. Of course, one could argue that it is shows like this that make trends happen.

The trend that I would like to see happen most is the dressing for your style and shape. I mean, let's face it....while these characters may start new trends we will still be facing the issue of whether the trends are good for us as individuals or not. It reminds me on the Manolo Blahnik craze that happened with Sex and The City. Suddenly women all over the country were willing to pay over $600 for shoes!!

Wouldn't it be nice if we could take a page from these women and say, "I'm going to wear a jacket with a peplum because it shows off my tiny waist and accentuates the curve of my hips"? Next time you go shopping look at yourself in the dressing room mirror and ask whether the outfit you are wearing is a fashion wow or a wow for you personally. If the answer is a personal wow, then break out the card and buy it...otherwise, save yourself some closet space and return it to the rack.

Season for Sales

My mailbox is overflowing with sale fliers right now!! January is when the stores are getting rid of all the winter merchandise so that they can bring in the Spring lines. It seems that the retail industry has gotten more and more anxious about getting merchandise for the next season out. So, if you are looking for something to wear right now (while it is still cold outside), then you will probably end up rifling through the sale racks.

Here are a couple of tips for sale searching:

1. Remember that most of these items are on the rack for a reason. Whether it is poor fit, uncomfortable fabric or over pricing.....they usually ended up on the rack because the general feeling was that they weren't worth buying. There are, of course, some exceptions to this rule and those are the items that you are looking for.



2. Just because it is a good price doesn't mean that it is a good buy. If you haven't read the article on price per wearing, look in our article archives (http://www.anatomyofstyle.com/, members only). This article got the greatest response from our members. Bottom line is that $20.00 worn once equals $100 worn 5 times!!



3. Don't settle for something that you would not have purchased at full price. If you would never have considered a piece when it was priced at the full retail price, why would you consider it now. The only exception to this rule is that you would have purchased the piece, but you did not have the money. Now that it is on sale you can afford to buy it. Otherwise, let it stay on the rack!



4. Finally, don't buy just to buy. Make sure that you are making purchases that make sense in your wardrobe. Have a plan or you will create chaos that has an effect on various parts of your life. A good deal that doesn't serve you is actually a very pricey mistake.

With all of this said, hit the sales and find the treasures that you might not have been able to add to your wardrobe before. Just remember, buy with purpose!!

Happy Shopping!

Managing that Magazine Mountain

I get a couple dozen magazines every month. I
have great intentions when I stack them next to my chair. I think that I will sit down and relax in the evenings and pour through all those glossy pages. However, things get crazy and I've only read a few pages when something comes up. If I manage to get through an entire issue and find things that I want to go back to, I add the magazine back to the stack. The stack grows and grows and before you know it, I have a mountain.

In addition to the magazines that I get at my home and office, I buy a few every time I get on an airplane. With this last trip over the holidays, I purchased 4 fabulously glossy magazines in the airport before boarding. Although they may all fit in my Louis Vuitton Never Full bag, it makes it awfully heavy. I decided on the airplane to try something new.

As I read through the magazine, I tore out pages that had something of interest that I wanted to return to. I made four piles: things I want to try, things I want to explore as topics for anatomyofstyle.com, websites I want to visit, and clothes that I love.

I managed to complete this process for two magazines before the plane landed in Denver. When the flight attendant came around for trash, I gladly let go of the two magazines I had read from cover to cover. It made my Never Full bag significantly lighter and I was able to retain the information that I found of value.

Interestingly, I only came out with about 10 pages per magazine that were relevant!! That mountain that has managed to take over a corner in my office and a spot in my living room represent about 200 pages that are of interest to me....less than one complete magazine. I've considered cancelling some of my subscriptions in an effort to manage the mountain, but I think that I have finally hit upon the answer.

So, now I have a bunch of loose pages in piles. What to do...what to do. I got back to the office, after a wonderful holiday, and put the pages in a binder with dividers. I spent about an hour visiting the websites that I wanted to see and ordering the products that I wanted to try. In our next editorial meeting I will share the information that I think we may want to expand on and report on our site.

After I visited sites and bookmarked them or ordered a product, I tossed those pages. I am feeling fabulously light and getting the most value ever out of my glossies. How's that for tackling a New Year's resolution (be more organized) right out of the gate?