This Keeps Coming Up

Since I started writing this blog I have said over and over that we have to be our own best friends, we have to love ourselves or we have to treat ourselves like we would the people in our lives. Everything that I write about is coming from experiences that I have recently had or conversations that I have been involved in or something in pop culture that triggers these thoughts. So, it isn't that I think I have to repeat myself to be heard. It is that the topic of being good to yourself is a common subject these days.

This time it came up in a conversation with a male friend of mine. A relationship that he was in recently ended. It ended badly and he was hurt. Over cocktails the other night he told me and my girlfriends about the situation. He was looking for some clarity...for some way to not hurt so bad. One of my girlfriends spent time working through what his exes actions meant in terms of communication. When they finished their conversation he said, "Yea, but what do I say if she calls?" Both of my girlfriends said, "She won't call." But, he said it again, "What if she does. I don't know what to say." I gave him my pearls of wisdom.

He called me yesterday and said that what really stuck with him was what I said. So here it is. I said to tell her that he loved her and cared deeply for her but that now it was time to love himself and take care of himself. That's it...don't say anymore. Get it out, get off the phone and then do it....take care of himself. He said that statement made him feel like it was possible to move on. What does this have to do with style?

As usual, I will say that the way you feel about yourself is reflected in how you look. Your opinion about yourself is the absolute first part of style. If you are hurt, rejected or abused in any way it will show in your demeanor and confidence; which then affects your appearance. The only....and I mean the only way to get back your confidence and beauty is to take care of yourself. Accept that whatever happened happened. It is what it is. Figure out what you need to start to heal and then do it!